The E! True Hollywood Story: True Hollywood Story

How much does one make for compiling an E!True Hollywood Story? Or rather, how much respect does a THS compiler have in the television production world? THS: 18 Worst Hollywood Tragedies....THS: 15 Most Deadly Hollywood Curses....THS: 10 Greatest Stories Ever Told....THS: 12 Best Hollywood Makeovers...there is no LITERALLY no end in sight as each topic is completely devoid of objectivity and the list is out-dated by the time it airs. What's more, each topic needs to be re-addressed every couple of years to incorporate the inevitable NEW worst tragedies and the NEW greatest stories! THS could film the same episode every day, but written by someone different, who would ultimately create a list of 12 OTHER Best Hollywood Slumber Parties! So the vague subjectivity around which the THS franchise has been built is simultaneously it's key to job security.

What is the dialogue in the production meeting like?

Incompetent and clueless male manager (think Keanu Reeves): So....like, what can we talk about this week, Cameron?

Stereotypically ditzy blond female staffer (for these purposes, played by Cameron Diaz): Well, Mr. Reeves, I was thinking we could take the the makeovers episode and re-air it, only this time call it THS: 12 Hollywood Hotties, Before They Were Hott!!!!

Keanu: Camerooooon....we've talked about thissssss....don't call me Mr. Reeves, that makes me feel old...and I can't be old because I haven't accomplished anything yet. But that's a great idea...we should really, really think about doing that...

Sarcastic and overweight male staffer (in complete disregard for the 3rd dimension...played by Eric Cartman): Oh, f*** yeah guys! Let's do it...and next week, why don't we air it again and call it 12 Most Amazing Hollywood Transformations! 

Keanu: Great idea Eric! I dig your thought process....Cameron, make sure you write that one down...

Upstaged-Cameron: Point for the fat guy...

Eric: I’m not fat, I just haven’t grown into my body yet you skinny b****. 

Oblivious Keanu: Great meeting guys...I'm gonna go to Jack in the Box now...you can get breakfast there ALL day!

(*Disclaimer: The 2pm Lunch Crew watches a lot of E! True Hollywood Story.)